Stupid things people say to pregnant women

This is a slight mini rant and part heads up for all you people out there who have never been pregnant before. Maybe it's because some people don't realise how daunting, scary and worrying (as well as wonderful, exciting and amazing) experience pregnancy can be, that they don't think before they speak. Since I got pregnant, I've had friends give me a ton of brilliant, helpful advice, stories and tips. But I've also had friends say some really awful, stupid things which a pregnant woman just doesn't need to know or be asked! 

So what are the big taboos that you really shouldn't broach with a pregnant lady? Well, here's a short list (all of which have been said to me by well meaning but rather silly people):

1. Now, this is at the TOP of my list for a reason. If you don't bother reading any of the other points below, PLEASE take note of this one. Don't tell your pregnant friend horror stories about people you know loosing their babies. Now TWO friends have told me stories like this and it BAFFLES me why ANYONE thinks it's ok to tell an already worried mother-to-be that something awful could happen to their unborn baby. Pregnant women worry a lot. They worry if they get some bleeding. They worry if they get a cramp. They worry if baby hasn't started moving yet. They worry if baby stops moving. They worry that baby is developing normally. DON'T add to their fears! It's totally unnecessary and sows a little seed of fear in the pregnant woman's head which will just niggle and niggle and grow. It doesn't matter how unlikely it is to happen (which by the way it IS very unlikely and only happens to a very small percentage of women), it's just not ok. It's not only a stupid thing to say, it's also pretty flipping insensitive! THINK before you speak guys!
2. Don't tell horror stories about birth. Now I"m not talking about mentioning the gruesome bits of labour (such as tearing, *shudder*, and pooing yourself!) as those are kind of common knowledge and although not pleasant are not the stuff of nightmares. No, I'm talking about the REAL disaster stories. Commenting whilst watching Britain's Got Talent that Amanda Holden almost died giving birth, and how her husband thought someone had turned a tap on before he realised the gushing noise was her bleeding to death, is NOT something a pregnant woman wants to hear. It's a possible reality and really isn't something that a girl wants to be worrying about when she gets to hospital. Avoid the tragic "she died giving birth" stories too. We have to read plenty of sad stories in the news without having to sit there whilst someone recounts yet another one.
3. Don't ask if the pregnancy was planned. It's a really personal question and not one that is really ever easily answered unless you're a very very close friend. You'd be amazed how many friends and colleagues have asked me this question. How AM I supposed to answer that? "No, it was an accident as we weren't using protection"? Seriously, don't ask people that. For all you know, they may have been trying for a very long time, or may have had previous miscarriages, and asking someone if their pregnancy was planned is kind of rude.
4. Now this last one is something loads of people have said to me, and luckily it really doesn't bother me much, but I'm guessing it could upset someone who is possibly sensitive about their weight. There's so many people who have asked me if I'm sure I'm not having twins, and am I sure I got my dates right as I look HUGE. I've even had people at work plaster themselves against the wall as I walk past, like im taking up all the space in the corridor. Personally I find it quite funny and laugh it off, but perhaps you may want to tone down the comments on size! 

So, next time you see a mummy-to-be and get on to the subject of this exciting and wonderful time of their life, spare us the stories that will ultimately keep us up at night and stick to positive, happy stories. Just think before you speak! Thanks!