More! More!

One word I never thought I would hear my daughter say whilst sat in a high chair. But that's exactly what she says. More cheese! More more! More egg! She asks for chips (dips), sausages (which she'd never had before until the day before last), beans (she loves green beans). Ok so the sausages are gluten free. The cheese is dairy free and made from coconut. We can't use any oils other than coconut or rice bran and she constahntly wants biscuits and oat cakes which bring her out in itchy eczema. But still. She's EATING! I don't even begrudge being woken up at 3am with her whacking me over the head crying "muk! muk!" (that's munchkin for milk by the way). She's gone from barely drinking 15oz to guzzling over 30. Plus food. That little doubtful voice in my head keeps saying "don't brag. Don't talk about it. You'll jinx it and it'll all go back to her refusing everything". And it does happen. A cold or a bug and she refuses everything orally other than medicine (which she asks for frequently, saying "itchy" even when she isn't). Milk, medicine and mum mums have become delaying tactics at bed time. Most parents would be annoyed but half of me is amazed that she's asking at all. Almost 20 months of hell. Of struggling to keep her weight up. Almost spiralling into depression. Dreading being left alone with her and having to battle feeds. And then all of a sudden she decided she was hungry. 

For lent I've been collecting money in a jar for things I'm thankful for. Every time I find change, I put it in the jar. I found £2 in the street the other day. It went straight in the jar. And every time I hear that clink as the coin drops into the glass, I don't say I'm grateful for my health, or my house, my family or my husband (although I am whole heartedly grateful for all of those blessings). I say I'm grateful that my daughter is eating.